[JenK]

Well, I'm supposed to wake up in 2 hours to leave for the hospital. Somehow, I'm not thinking this will be a problem since I doubt I'll make it to sleep at all. Strangely enough, considering my choice, surgery is actually a phobia of mine so on top of my general jitters over keeping expectations on an even keel (thinking positive but not expecting a cure all miracle) I've got the what if's running through my head at a pretty whirlwind pace. Thankfully I hear they have these nice relaxing shots they can give you before.

So, while I've read a lot about everyone being excited, did anybody find themselves a bit nervous before or am I just being an over reactive baby?

I'm confident I've made the right choice for procedure.
I trust my surgeon. My family is amazing and incredibly supportive etc...
However, my biggest question that I'm obsessing over tonight/this morning and trying to answer/resolve is... What now? After almost 20 years of pain, arguing with doctors, horrible drugs & what seems like endless amounts of tears, what in the world am I going to do with myself if this turns out the way I hope and expect it to? What will I do if it doesn't? Did I mention I'm a hit neurotic?

Anyway, I'll try my best to keep everyone updated under the "after stories" section and promise to answer my PM about quitting smoking very soon but at the moment I would love to hear what ya'll thought about or maybe questioned the night or few days before or if, frankly, I'm just over reacting and a bit too uptight/crazy?

It's August 23, 2013!
There's no turning back now! Here's to a new life path and what promises to be an amazing future regardless of the outcome!