I haven't been on in awhile. I'm not really sure why. I've been pretty depressed, and it's really taking a toll on my family life. Especially my relationship with my wife. That's not why I'm writing now though. One issue at a time, right?
I am finally almost to my appt. date to see my surgeon again on April 1st. An appointment which was made back in January if you can believe it. I had a car accident on March 3rd. Nothing too major, but enough that it certainly seems to have caused greater issues with my lower back. The other update lacking from my signature is that I have been taking Avinza (morphine) for 3 or 4 months now due to the pain becoming more intolerable.
Since the day of the accident the pain has been incredible. I am on all these narcotics and muscle-relaxants but still have great difficulty making it through a work day, or even rolling over in bed. My sciatic spasm episodes have also come back. Just quick bursts, but something I truly hadn't missed!
I was (or am - I'm not sure now) ready to visit the surgeon and tell him that if I could not have the bi-level ADR, then I want whatever surgery can actually be performed which will be covered by my insurance - the "hybrid" surgery or a fusion at BOTH levels! I've had it. Then for no reason at all, likely temporarily, my pain levels have returned to where they were before the accident today. The weather is actually nice today - could that be it?
I'm just so confused. My back pain completely controls and ruins or diminishes every aspect of my life. I work or am lying in bed unless there is something of importance to do. This is absolutely no way to live! I do not even have memories left of what it was like to exist without this pain and hinderance as part of my life.
Any suggestions on how I should address this with my surgeon? In some ways, based on my mental state, I am fearful I may get what I am asking for and then live to regret it the rest of my life.
PS - Harrison, I do hope you have time to chime in with any thoughts or advice. You've always offered meaningful posts in the past. You don't know me, but you have actually spoke with my wife Cathy in the past about me. She was way ahead of me at getting online and locating this website. It's likely been years since you two have spoke, so don't wrack your memory too much about it!
Thank you for what you do for those like me.