Quote:
Originally Posted by Grover771
I feel like the pain is coming from the discs. Each side of my spine doesn't really hurt. It just doesn't feel like its a joint. But I feel like people think I'm Lying or something... I don't know. Just a low day. Hubby doesn't want me to even consider 3 level fusion because of everything we've read.. But at some point I've got to make a decision. I just don't want to be one of those people who live on pain pills..everyone in my family had an addictive behavior of some sort (smoking, alcohol, etc.) and I don't want that. I miss gardening. I carry a pillow with me everywhere I go. I feel like people look at me like I'm 85 or something. Oh well. Sorry... Just a low day.
Lillyth, when do you leave for Europe? I'll send up prayers for a successful surgery.
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Thank you so much Grover! Funny, all this time I thought you were a guy because of your handle!
I feel ya (literally) about the pain. And the pillow carrying.
I can't recall, is overseas just not in the cards for you? Or are you waiting on a film review?
A family history of addiction can be very daunting, but do remember that you are not your family members. If you need something to quell the pain, even for a little bit, that is not addiction. That is pain management.
Yeah, I know all about people thinking you are lying. I walked into one doctor's office and said "Hi, I have three ruptured discs in my neck, one of which is impinging on my spinal cord. I need you to replace them all please." His response? "You have three ruptured discs, one pinching your spinal cord?" Then, when he got my MRI back looked at me aghast. My response? "I TOLD you I had three ruptured discs, one pinching my spinal cord!" For years my husband's friends thought I was a hypochondriac who was using my pain as an excuse not to work and to let my husband earn all the money. Now they realize the truth. In the words of one of them "You can't fake a spinal injury."
And please, never apologize for having a low point. That is the whole point of this site. Is for us to support one another. And we can't do that if we don't know you are having a bad day. We all have them, so we all get it. Not that I was ever at any point considering suicide seriously (I love my husband and my son too much to do that to them), but there have been days when I have just thought I could not take it anymore, and wished for death. But it is the days where, despite the pain, we have a good day, that makes it bearable. I hope you have a good day quite soon. Put on your favorite music and get into whatever position causes you the least amount of pain (I won't even try to say comfortable. I don't know about you, but for me there is no such thing.) and just let that music transport you out of your body (and your HEAD) for just a little while.
This time next week I will be in Barcelona. It is seeming surreal now. We leave the 16th (SFO) and land in Barcelona on the 17th, with pre-op and surgery on the 18th. I am very happy for your offer of prayers, and in fact, was thinking of suggesting a "prayer circle" whenever one of us goes into surgery. I know Gina goes in tomorrow, so let's all hold her in our hearts and minds in whatever fashion we do. Lighting a candle, praying, sending good vibes, whatever. It's all the same, IMO. It has been scientifically proven, BTW, the power of prayer. Double blind peer reviewed and all!