[ckessel]

Here are my basics. If anyone can refer me to someone in Portland to start the process, that'd be great.

- I live in Portland, OR
- 41, fairly fit, used to be pretty active, but activity now is very constrained
- L5 rupture at age 30, major back spasm at the time, intense pain and loss of some motion in left foot (toes). Not sure if it's L4-L5 or L5-S1.
- MRI 10 years ago was "inconclusive", minor rupture but not obvious pinching. Chiropractic, pain and muscle relaxant meds, and time restored more or less "normal" abilities. 2 MRI's since show a degenerate disc, but "nothing major, surgery may not help".
- Worked around it for 5-6 years, wore a back brace during sports, but still played volleyball. Had occasional flare ups with back spasms. Managed with muscle relaxants, NSAIDs, and stretching.
- Gradual worsening. Gave up volleyball at age 36. Very careful with how I lift weights.
- BLEEDING ULCER. Tangentially related. Turns out I'm one of those 1 in 100 that's allergic to NSAIDS (ibuprofen). I'm not allowed to take it anymore to manage swelling/pain/stiffness in my back. I had been taking them regularly (daily) on my doctor's recommendation to manage my back pain/spasms. Son of a bitch!
- Steady degradation of abilities. I can still lift weights and bike limited distances (~6 miles before foot numbness), but walking any significant distance (more than 1-2 miles) results in a very stiff back. If I walk more than a day or two straight, like say a family trip to Disneyland, I have back spasms and am laid up in bed for a few days of very limited activity.
- Today: Walking distance is limited. I can't sleep on my back at all anymore. I wake up often (in pain) with my lower back muscles trembling if I've rolled onto my back in my sleep. To the casual eye, I'm fit and strong from weights and a stationary bike, but I feel near crippled. I fear stairs if my back is feeling stiff knowing a spasm is waiting for any wrong step. It's embarrassing to say, but sometimes if my back is bad it really inhibits my ability to be romantically inclined. I read one person's report that they're basically impotent after surgery, so that scares me a bit.

In short, it's gone with something I could live with to something very much determining how I live. I'm in tears as I write this, just in hopes something can be done. I've seen doctors three times over the last 10 years (including new MRIs) and get the same "No nerve damage, should be manageable. Wait for fusion as long as you can." message. I can't walk with my family while on vacation. I can't throw a baseball with my son for fear I'll have to bend to catch a ball. I can't sit at a restaurant for the full dinner without having to stand and stretch my back for a minute. I don't want to keep "managing" like this. I've got probably 40+ years of life left and I already have more limitations than most people I know 20-30 years older than me.

So, what do I do? What do I ask? Who do I ask? Is one replacement disc model significantly any better than another? Where do I start looking for a doctor who can navigate me down the road to some sort of solution even if it's not ADR?

My thanks to anyone that can help point me in the right direction.