Spine Psychology

[biffnoble]

How are we affected emotionally, mentally, socially by spine disease?

For those that have been relieved of the physical burden of spine disease what has changed psychologically?

Is it possible that cervical spine disease has a more profound psychological effect than lumbar because of the greater functional loss (breathing) potential disease in cervical spine, nearness to the brain, or primitive reflexes associated with the cervical spine region?

Input from fellow spineys much appreciated!

[Mariaa]

Biffnoble,
I could go on forever about how lumbar spine probs have changed my life and psychologically affected me however, you'd be admitting me to a funny farm about midway into my rant so all I can say is "mucho,bastante,demasiado"~

[biffnoble]

It's odd Mariaa: I was just wondering what a response from you would be, and there it was!

Nuestra situacion esta malisima!

Chronic Pain.
Poor Sleep.
Blame.
Guilt.
Fear.
Anger.
Financial Loss.
Powerlessness.
Sense of Worthlessness.
Conflict.
Hopelessness.
Social Disconnection.
Physical Incapacity.
Brain Fog.
Mean Spiritedness.

The list is endless.

It's important to separate "me" from this disease. It's vital for those of us that had a pre-disease life to remember who we were, and might become if we get the best treatment.

That 95% of the negatives I ascribe to myself are symptoms of an identified physical disease and not my: bad character, or bad karma, low blood sugar, depressed personality, etc.. That in fact I've done a good job (that's what I've been told) of being a good person in spite of this affliction.

These are the acids that have etched my life so deeply:

* Chronic Pain.
* Poor, Useless Sleep.
* Physical Incapacity.
* Ruination of several Careers.

I've twisted and turned, done the fanciest footwork, broken field running, but never seemed to get to a viable place. Always blamed myself, and blamed those around me. Externalizing an internal demon, a physical pathology that really was never going to "yield" to my will.

So I ask others: how have you dealt with the psychic costs of your disease?

I'm looking forward to your responses.

[ans]

Cervie,

Great posting and excellent list.

Cope? Wellbutrin, starting to exercise again for endorphin release/muscle tone/vanity. Can't do fieldwork in carrying a heavy daypack like I used to. Gained empathy/understanding about a community I never really thought about. And I'm doing very well compared to most.

[Mariaa]

Let's see.. I still like myself even tho I have so much crap going on~

I stopped saying "I used to..." and just do what I can do now and don't spend too much time beating myself up for what I cannot do, rather try and enable myself to do whatever I can do~

Dog walking...somehow this simple activity is like the biggest breath of fresh air. As is going to the doggy beach and playing w/my dog and others there~ the dogs can run and I don't have to...

Cats, love 'em cuz they're lazier than me...have 3. Great role models in the art of laziness~

Stay in touch w/good friends, read when I can keep my mind on what I'm reading and get out as much as I can which isn't much but beats the heck out of never/hardly ever...

Over the last 23 bad back years I've felt bad about just about anything and everything about myself possible.. I've tired of that. Wasted emotion for the most part..

Half of staying sane is perspective in my book...
the rest~ ???

[ans]

Maybe the "wasted emotion" reflects stark adjustment to limitations. I wouldn't handle 23 yrs. of pain/injury/surgeries too well - esp. w/ the memory that I once was very athletic.

[biffnoble]

ans & mariaa:

How did your back probs begin?

When were they the worst?

[biffnoble]

As a cervie with cord stenosis.

I'd like to know more about the psychological effects of impeded CFS flow.

Subtle behavioral and functional effects of an irritated compressed cord: sleep, affect, etc..

Not the sledgehammer symptoms, but the subtle ones that would be characterized as pyschological problems, and yet that might clear up after the spine pathology is treated.

This info if it exists is nowhere to be found.

More topic aspects.

This kind of stuff not necessarily fibromyalgia related:

http://www.heffezneurosurgical.com/abstract2.jsp

http://www.heffezneurosurgical.com/poster1big.html

[ans]

Cervie, I injured my back twice (the loud pop) in the 70's. Intermittent sciatica/back pain periods from nothing, e.g. moving to grab a falling piece of paper. 2.3 yrs. ago at computer and foot numb but actually foot drop hit immediately. Recommended: disectomy two levels. Later, w/regained walking (then, no consistent back pain) I tried lifting wts. (~ 100 lbs. benching which is considered light) and since then, nonstop back pain. I'm lucky by contrast. Worst after initial injuries in 70's (crawling for a week) and in episodes. The wt. lifting was very stupid (back doc was shocked to hear this) and there's episodes. I've got it relatively easy. Be well, ans

[annapurna]

Sometimes it's not only how we view ourselves, but also how our families and associates view us in light of our pain and disability. Some members of my family firmly believe that my spine problems are a result of "irresponsible living", "extreme sports", and "justifiable consequences for being a bad/sinful person". Since they share my DNA, are generally thirty years + older than me, and don't have my spine problems they reason that it's all my own fault. This has led to a significant estrangement from these individuals, so, I could say that my spine issues have resulted in separation from loved ones.